Monday, 4 November 2013
Sunday, 3 November 2013
Screenplay Draft 2
After receiving feedback from Simon and re thinking my ideas, I have come up with a 2nd final draft for my screenplay.
Update on The Meeting Idea & Pitch.
After receiving my feedback for my script, I've decided to change the idea around a little. Instead of the son being adopted and meeting his biological Dad, I've changed it so that the son isn't adopted, but has an absent father in his life who he's hardly seen.
The son is going to find a letter from his Dad which he wrote when his son was born (as he knew he wouldn't hardly be part of his life due to his own lifestyle). Instead of the letter being a certificate of adoption, it will be a letter from his Dad hoping to one day properly meet up with his son. This will then encourage Ben to go forth and properly meet up with his dad as he's only met him a few times in his life. The scene will still be awkward between Ben and Rick but make sense as Ben's got a step Dad whom he doesn't appreciate until he meets his arrogant, lazy Dad.
The change:
Ben has had enough by the end of the meeting and suddenly receives a phone call from his step Dad who is worried about him. Ben then sticks up for himself and leaves immediately, however still feels bad for his Dad as his Dad genuinely feels bad about the life he lives and wants to change and feel more involved in Bens life. A few weeks later the Dad will be looking at himself in the mirror wearing a suit trying to rebuild his life, heading out to a job interview. As he leaves, he notices some milk on his door step as a small gesture from his son (as when he met his Dad he was out of milk as he hardly has any money). Ben will also still want to get on with his Dad and fix their relationship but appreciate his family more.
Important note: In my script I'm going to re arrange the meeting scene (page 6) to page 1, this will mean that my film uses a non linear structure - inspired by the Christopher Nolan 2004 film: Memento. After the meeting has happened, the film will flash back to the morning before the meeting happened. I want to do this to create a non conventional film and make the audience try and figure out who's meeting and why the atmosphere is so tense and awkward.
I've decided to create the first 2 minutes of my film instead of a trailer - however, during production I'm going to film more scenes throughout my script so that if the first 2 minutes doesn't work out, I'll have the choice to change my idea to a 2 minute trailer.
Being inspired by the 2004 Christopher Nolan Film - Memento, has inspired me to create a NON - LINEAR narrative. I want the first 2 minutes of my film to consist of the actual meeting between the two characters, then I want the script to start from the beginning of that day to show the build up and how the characters lives were before the meeting. I also was inspired by Roland Barthes The Hermeneutic Code theory as I believe creating a non linear narrative will confuse the audience yet create a hook at the start of the film to encourage the audience to want to know what's going to happen.
THE PITCH.
''A dramatic story about a naive young teen, determined to meet his biological father. But will it all crash when the two opposites collide?''
The son is going to find a letter from his Dad which he wrote when his son was born (as he knew he wouldn't hardly be part of his life due to his own lifestyle). Instead of the letter being a certificate of adoption, it will be a letter from his Dad hoping to one day properly meet up with his son. This will then encourage Ben to go forth and properly meet up with his dad as he's only met him a few times in his life. The scene will still be awkward between Ben and Rick but make sense as Ben's got a step Dad whom he doesn't appreciate until he meets his arrogant, lazy Dad.
The change:
Ben has had enough by the end of the meeting and suddenly receives a phone call from his step Dad who is worried about him. Ben then sticks up for himself and leaves immediately, however still feels bad for his Dad as his Dad genuinely feels bad about the life he lives and wants to change and feel more involved in Bens life. A few weeks later the Dad will be looking at himself in the mirror wearing a suit trying to rebuild his life, heading out to a job interview. As he leaves, he notices some milk on his door step as a small gesture from his son (as when he met his Dad he was out of milk as he hardly has any money). Ben will also still want to get on with his Dad and fix their relationship but appreciate his family more.
Important note: In my script I'm going to re arrange the meeting scene (page 6) to page 1, this will mean that my film uses a non linear structure - inspired by the Christopher Nolan 2004 film: Memento. After the meeting has happened, the film will flash back to the morning before the meeting happened. I want to do this to create a non conventional film and make the audience try and figure out who's meeting and why the atmosphere is so tense and awkward.
I've decided to create the first 2 minutes of my film instead of a trailer - however, during production I'm going to film more scenes throughout my script so that if the first 2 minutes doesn't work out, I'll have the choice to change my idea to a 2 minute trailer.
Being inspired by the 2004 Christopher Nolan Film - Memento, has inspired me to create a NON - LINEAR narrative. I want the first 2 minutes of my film to consist of the actual meeting between the two characters, then I want the script to start from the beginning of that day to show the build up and how the characters lives were before the meeting. I also was inspired by Roland Barthes The Hermeneutic Code theory as I believe creating a non linear narrative will confuse the audience yet create a hook at the start of the film to encourage the audience to want to know what's going to happen.
THE PITCH.
My original pitch.
New pitch.
''A dramatic story about a naive young teen, determined to re connect with his absent father. But will it all crash when the two opposites collide?''
Saturday, 2 November 2013
Screenplay Feedback
Script Feedback: The Meeting
After handing my script in, my teacher, Simon Welsford read through it and gave me feedback on the story & structure, action & dialogue and formatting and layout. Simon also went through our scripts and added notes on each page to help us.
Here is the script report I received back.
After reading through the feedback I also read back through my script and realised the mistakes I had made. I noticed how my dialogue on the actual meeting between the two characters was too forced and forward - I realise now that I need to let the dialogue build up, although Ben will be excited to meet/re connect with his Dad, he would still be nervous and it would be too awkward to just go straight into what happened between them. To change this I'm going to add more dialogue and let it gradually build into a heated argument.
At first I didn't want to change the Dad to an absent father as I felt the adoption story line would be stronger. However, after a lot of reconsideration I realised that it would make more sense to have the Dad being an absent father as I've not mentioned the biological mum at all.
RISK ASSESSMENT
Health & Safety: Risk Assessment.
To make sure that all cast and crew are safe, I decided to take a risk assessment. To do this I made a list of all the possible hazards and risks in all of my locations and decide what can be done to prevent them.
The locations I assessed was;
- River
- Kitchen(s)
Friday, 1 November 2013
Unit 1: Filming Schedule.
Filming Schedule.
To keep myself organised and prepared, I have decided to create a filming schedule. I have booked out a camera for the 5th and 6th November (to return on the 7th) so I have made sure that I've evenly scheduled times that myself and my actors are able to film in.
I have decided to film the scenes which only need around 15 minutes each on the same day. I have then split up the 1-4 hour filming times over the 2 days so myself and the actors will have time to prepare and rest in between scenes.
Production Preperation Work.
LOCATION:
PROPS:
The location for 'The Meeting' will be in a small, cramped kitchen - this is to show that the father isn't very well off and show the strain that he is living in. To show the problems that the father is having (such as being an alcoholic and drug abuser and being dis-organised) I have placed some tablets, strongbow, and cigarettes onto the table. I have also decided I will arrange some letters and leaflets on the table to show that the father could be in debt and show how he's a messy person.
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